A Sunday morning brush with the Law
One Sunday morning ten years ago I was taking a load of
rotted muck with the tractor and trailer down to an allotment in town, on the way I had to pass the police
depot along side the M6 motorway.
As I was loaded I did a rolling exit out of a road junction,
but unfortunately a motorway patrol car was just coming down off the bridge,
(they were just going for a tea break, and thought I had no brakes), I carried
on over the bridge and in another quarter mile, then a siren started blasting
and headlights and beacons flashing. They pulled diagonally across the road in
front of me, as if to test my brakes, the brakes were spot on and did not ram
them as they deserved.
One officer went round the outfit and found nothing wrong,
so I was loaded into the back of the patrol car and locked in. I might add that
around rotted damp muck ruck ya boot get mighty clogged up with muck and all
this went into the back of the patrol car. They took a note of my insurance
they had already seen the up to date tax disc. So there nothing else to do but
breathalyse me, they said keep blowing,
blow, blow, blow, all I had drunk, as all I ever drink was tea.
Not able to pin anything on me or the outfit, one got out
and unlocked the door to let me out, can you imagine a pair of size twelve
wellington boots well clogged up with muck, and the two front seats well pushed
back for their comfort, left me no option but to wipe my feet on the way out.
I think they were too lazy to find anything on the motorway
to make up their daily quota and found me as a soft touch. It was just a pity
it was not pig muck, they would have remembered that.
Progress isn't made by early risers. It's made by lazy men trying to find easier ways to do something.
Robert Heinlein (1907 - 1988)
No comments:
Post a Comment